Week Forty Nine

Time is a valuable commodity to us all and I have enjoyed this past twelve months making good use of it for the first time ever in my life, What I have noticed over the past few weeks is how it seems to be running out for me at the moment and that also means in the next three months as well as the training for the London Marathon ramps up. I have noticed that I am getting more tired these past two weeks and I have less time to sit and relax with a little me time.

Today I am writing this blog feeling very ill I think its to do with my eating to much protein not enough carbs? I have smelly breath when I burp at the moment which is a sign, I need to find information or help to correct this problem, who'd of thought me being ill because I'm healthy and exercising and doing the right thing I think this problem is caused by the extra training I'm now doing for the London Marathon so I need to adjust what and how I eat to correct this problem.

Ok this is me with my compression tights on and my running vest for "Look" the charity I am running for in the London Marathon I will be wearing the vest for Brighton as well, for all the great work I've done dressed like this I look fat still need to lose weight, so that scales and camera's that lie now, anyway the compression tights worked well, to early to say they are brilliant yet but I felt the difference whilst running in them they seem to add a bit of confidence which is always welcome as the runs get longer and harder.

Training for last week was good with the exception of Saturday when I needed to do an hour's cardio boxing on the x-box as I explained earlier having problems with tiredness and my shift pattern by the time I got up got myself sorted I was unable to get myself in a position to do the hour's training and then do a full shift at work. I could have lied and just made up that I had done this training but that would have meant letting myself down and that will never happen anymore in my life. I will promise to make this one hour session up in the future as I have done in my training for the Great South Run if I missed a training session I would always make it up, it will be slightly harder now but not impossible. My body is telling me to adjust and I need to listen and make sure that that I get the basic's right that's Fuel and Hydration for my body the correct amount of training and good quality rest all to be done around my normal working and living environment. My training record can be seen on this link  http://connect.garmin.com/activities  as always.

I had a fasting blood test for my Diabetes this week more details to follow in a couple of weeks when I get the results but I was weighed and had my height measured I Know I said no weights till Brighton weekend but the scales at the doctor's surgery had me at 95kg with shoes off came home and weighed myself not that light but good enough plus they were a midweek weigh in not a normal Sunday weigh in. They are the official weight on my records now, I have grown by one inch to 5ft 8in  maybe just standing taller and prouder but its a good thing. My BMI has come down by about 17 points as well from my heaviest. Great strides and show's the value of patience and perseverance.  

Week Forty Eight

Just looked at the week number for this weeks blog only four weeks or one month away from my one year anniversary with Thinking Slimmer where has that time gone? More in a months time bet your all looking forward to another long blog!!!

Training for the London Marathon has caused me a few issues this week and its something I need to get my head round very quickly. Let me explain, as you know I work a three week shift pattern so every third Sunday I'm on a day shift like today and this has caused me some worries, Sunday is the long run day of varying distance's until the marathon, I have got myself into a bit of a state over having to work all day then go out for a long run, mainly because of the weather and running part of it in the dark, so far with all my running/training I have done when I wanted to do so if the weather was bad I did not run I would just do it another day making sure that I caught up with the training that I wanted to do and I always made the runs up (If your not honest with yourself you cannot be honest with anyone) When I work a late shift and have some really long runs I will book a day off to recover, now I don't want to do that with the day shift as I will use up to many holidays, so I have to sort myself out to run for up to four or five hours after a full day at work. I can change the training plan around but I don't want to complicate it to much.

Now I have done today's run, it is only two hours and I have run this distance a couple of times now increasing the run by double or more is a cause for concern. I will sit down and see what I can tweak  to make it work better for me and get myself a little more relaxed before running longer distances. I think I have an old problem rearing its ugly head where I find/put myself under unnecessary pressure due to following something (I hope I explain myself here) Knowing I have a training plan takes away my choice knowing that over the next few months my long runs will vary between twelve and twenty miles and I have to do them, the three midweek runs offer no worries so I'm ok with those. I hate this head and I hate feeling like this I know that the slimpod has given me the answers and I feel like I am letting myself down by not finding the answers, I'm sure I will as I am better equipped than ever before to deal with how I feel.

Why do I have to do them? Because I know that I will be running in the greatest and first marathon in my life with two great people that like myself this means so much to each of us individually and as a group of three as we have shared our journeys and supported each other to get this far along our own amazing journeys. But also like the Great South Run once I was committed to running and started the training I knew that I would have to completed the race in some style with a half decent time and that drove my training, so the same apply's for the London Marathon but also 26 miles is a little different to 10 miles so my body needs to be ready to take on this challenge.

Right I have completed two weeks of the training plan and despite what I have just said about this week I have enjoyed them both last week I ran for twenty miles and did a1hr cardio boxing session this week was 22 miles and a 1hr cardio boxing session.

My weight this week was 99kg a gain of 1.2kg on last week. I will not weigh myself for four weeks for 3 reasons, I must stop weighing in every week I spend time on the Thinking slimmer pages telling people that scales are evil yet I weigh in all the time, secondly that will be the one year anniversary of starting with Thinking Slimmer and its also the Brighton Half Marathon race day. Training first weight second just like I did for the Great South Run.

Here's to working out my head and being in the right place to do what I do best and that's go out and enjoy my running.

Week Forty Seven

This week has gone really well loving feeling positive and learning new things as well, even after all this time when something comes along and you sit down and think about it and how to take the positive's and move on such a great feeling.

As last week's blog mentioned the London Marathon and my training plan, I have now completed the first week and it has gone well although a little glitch on Thursday hence the learning and not being negative when things don't go to plan. Right very strange at the start of a training plan because I was just training for the Brighton Half Marathon before (no plan involved or needed) my training previously was based around my shift work which is a three week rota, so I trained when I felt like it and/or it matched my shift pattern. Although I had know about entry to the marathon I really had very little time to sort out paper work to enter the marathon,training and then start work at 13:30 every afternoon so I ended up doing six days training out of seven this was very hard on my legs in the end. so this week I have completed the training plan and go into this weeks training a little more positive about my legs holding out. As the weeks go on and I settle into the plan things will be better as I adjust and make best use of the training. On a major positive note I have said nothing about my shifts getting in the way of training or making excuses about something or other, that's the slimpod at it's best I will have to make one or two minor alterations to the training plan but the rest I will just work round.

My training this week can be seen here http://connect.garmin.com/activities?cid=3993067

My weight this is 97.8kg a rise of 0.8kg which is nothing in the scheme of things after my nine mile run I checked my weight out of interest only and I was 97kg the same as last week but the morning weigh in is the one that counts. Week one BMI 34.8 Body Fat 53.7% Body Water 31.8% This week BMI 33.9 Body Fat 51.0% Body Water 33.8% so BMI down slightly Body Fat down a little and Body Water up a little.

As always the need to raise money and the charity I am running for in the London Marathon https://www.justgiving.com/account/your-pages and the Charity itself is http://www.look-uk.org/

Week Forty Six

A new year a new challenge a new lease of life. Things have transpired in the last week to enable me to find and be accepted for a charity place on the Virgin London Marathon 2012 one whole year earlier than originally plan. The Charity I found and that were happy for me to run for them is called LOOK UK  http://www.look-uk.org/ For regular readers of my blog (god bless you) will understand how I feel about the need for support and help on our journeys, For the parent's and carers of Children who have or get serious eyesight problems this becomes even more important to find the right information and answer's to there many question's by others who know and can help them. I am so pleased to have found a Charity were my own views and thoughts match the same as the aims. I do have to raise a minimum of £1500 which is a lot of money I have already set up a just giving page http://www.justgiving.com/Darin-McCloud1 which you all will see regularly. I also have a text page as well  Just text LOOK47 £ any amount to 70070 any amount will make a difference. I now get to run the Marathon with Becca and Dawn which will be an amazing experiences for all of us, you have never seen three grown adults so excited about running with each other, in what will be our first ever marathon.

Last week's blog was important for me to write it took me four days to write and took me in to a deep dark place, having come out of that I can see that the minor weight gain was no more than in other weeks when my weight has fluctuated this week is all positive and we all know positive is the only place to be. I have managed five runs this week which is good from tomorrow I will be looking at Becca's training plan she has kindly sent me (thank you) and getting on board with that. Although I have not done the last weeks of the plan which was when Becca and dawn started their training I have still been doing my bits so I'm not that far behind if at all. This is the link to my runs http://connect.garmin.com/dashboard?cid=1761538 

My weight this week is 97kg that's a loss of 3kg or 6.6lb loss 15st 3.8lbs (betting close to under 15st) this is also my lowest weight ever. my BMI is minus 1.2 my body fat is plus 2.8% and body water is plus 2.1% way to early to understand what has happened. I never dreamed I would get the chance to run this years London Marathon, now I have my goal is to train hard finish the race, time will be the time at the finish and to enjoy running it with two really great girls who are my inspiration and have pushed me to keep running during the winter months I am so looking forward to April 22nd 2012 may just be as emotional as October 30th 2011  

Week Forty Five New Years Day

I would like to wish everyone a Happy 2012. May all yours dreams hopes and journey's be successful ones. This blog is about a one year anniversary the first one of many that will happen during the coming months. Let me start by giving some background prior to me going to the press and why I did what I did.

Every decision we make we always try to make the right choices, the information we have available to us is important in making these decisions, with the information I had this was my choice that I made. During 2010 I had made a decision with medical advice that I wanted to go down the route of having a gastric bypass operation I had researched thoroughly and was happy that this was the route I wanted to go. The biggest factor was that after the operation I would not be diabetic(after a little time), no more needles no blood testing no insulin this to me was heaven and well worth putting myself through a major operation. The issue of weight was never a consideration in this process just a by product of the operation.

Now to obtain the funding for the operation required certain levels to be be met I had two co morbidity's diabetes and sleep apnoea and my weight met the guidelines set out by the NICE guidelines. All going well or so you would think, my local PCT do not follow NICE guidelines so I spent most of 2010 fighting them to get funding, if I lived 10 miles down the road in Sussex I could have the funding because I didn't I could not, I saw this as a massive injustice, with the help of my Doctor my local MP and a friend I was put in touch with who had fought the PCT and won I started a campaign of letter writing that lasted almost a year and in the end sucked the life out of me I can understand the PCT having no respect for me but the way they treated my doctor and MP was nothing short of disgraceful. I still have and will always keep all the correspondence regard this stressful time. That's the crux of my story and why and how I took the action's I did and brings us to this time last year the week between Christmas and New Year.

My lowest ebb, rock bottom, staring into the abyss, any other metaphor that you can think of this was it. My weight had reached its peak the week before Christmas breaking the 21 stone barrier the level needed to meet the PCT criteria. I could not walk upstairs without being out of breath I could only get in and out of the bath with a massive struggle life was unbearable. I woke up about 6am and only made it into the bathroom before being violently sick we have a decent size bathroom and there was not a clean spot anyway at floor level and I cleaned it all up before the missus got up. For three days I was sick and it was just as bad and as much as the first time it amazed me how much came out, during those three days I ate one piece of toast just to keep the missus happy and stop her moaning at me, I only drank water or tea and not a lot of it to be honest.

This was the wake up call, my body calling time on what I was doing to myself saying enough is enough you need help and fast. It was then that I knew I needed to go the local press to try and put pressure on the PCT to allow me funding for the operation or hope that someone out there would be able and willing to offer me help, because I need help and needed it quickly. This is the link to the story in the local paper this was the only print story I spoke to a reporter about, the nationals and worldwide press and internet picked it up and printed various versions of the story none of it good to be honest.
http://www.portsmouth.co.uk/news/local/east-hampshire/20_stone_is_not_fat_enough_for_op_patient_is_told_1_2343641

If you wish to Google me http://www.google.co.uk/search?source=ig&hl=en&rlz=1G1DSGQ_ENUK458&q=darin+mccloud&oq=darin+m&aq=0&aqi=g3g-s1g6&aql=&gs_sm=c&gs_upl=1250l2037l0l5217l4l3l0l0l0l0l549l549l5-1l1l0 you can find television and radio interviews plus loads and loads of comments most quite horrific, not thought out and having a go at obese/overweight people for the sake of it, if only the answer was to stop eating or eat less and it was that easy! to all the others thank you for your views and the thought you put into your comments for or against, I was well aware of the decisions I was making. Could this have been handled better? Yes it could, by me and the press, they make the decision how to run a story and that's their choice the more sensational the story the better, I needed help and thought this was the best way, I was hoping for an inside page story highlighting the problems with a postcode lottery what I got was a front page splash that then went global. In hindsight in my case probably not. Trying to get a good news update is near impossible, an update in the Daily Mail nearly made it three or four times always getting pulled at the last minute, to far fair the local paper has run a few positive updates as radio solent have done in a segment called drives lives.

So this is where we are, the next anniversary of note is the 26th January the day the News ran the story I will write more about that next month.

Back to the now this week has been quite hard, there's only so much will power against two weeks of knowing that box's of biscuits, tins of sweets are in the house I say to much as its all for one person as nothing is for me. Am I being selfish over this? you bet I am, because I know that if I fail and lose control I may never get it back again that's why I am a little hard core over this I never want to find out, I am happy for others to have these things but please how much can be eaten in two weeks the shops were closed for one day and one day only! I have eaten biscuits this week for the first time in eight or nine months over a few days and I hate myself for being weak and losing that control I am terrified that I have a taste for them again and will lose control. I will work hard for this not to happen but I am also having a battle with bread again this week, bad week control wise and I feel as though I have put on weight on.

One observation I have noticed is that I do not have any patience over this train of thought it really does affect me quite badly (I wish it didn't but it does)  I know there should be give and take but I find it hard what I see is a mirror image of me pre Thinking Slimmer and I hate that person the only difference is when I ate like that I piled on the weight and that's really why I am like I am, plus I am feeling a little bloated for the first time since I started the slimpod and it's not nice.

This time last year I was a overweight blob 21 stone's worth to be exact, to be honest I really thought that surgery was the answer, boy was I wrong on that, I just did not know it at the time here I am one year later weighing in at 15st 11lb wearing size 34 jeans and I am a long distance runner! That's right a long distance runner training every week and loving it. This brings me to the best day of my life ever which happened this year Sunday 30th October Check out the Video below and two pictures that I have hanging up with pride of place indoors. Since I started learning to run on May 14th I have been out 55 times 54 training 1 race and have completed 266 miles and burnt of 38,977 calories in the process.

01 November 2011 17:53

Want to have a little weep (of joy?) Watch Darin's video diary of his amazing day of achievement at the Great South Run with myself and Trevor. What's the greatest thing you've ever done?

Length: ‎2:49

This day is etched in my heart forever and whenever I feel a little down this is what brings me back. I ran a 10 mile road race with a little style, get out of here!!!!

I have a new set of scales posh ones that does weight, bmi, body fat, body water, no idea if there any good or not but as its the new year I will use them and see how we do. My weight this time last year was 133kg now its 100kg so that's a massive loss of 33kg only 17kg away from target weight, my lowest weight was 98.3kg so I'm not far away from that. My details on the new scales are Weight 98.8kg BMI 34.8 Body Fat 53.7% Body Water31.8% I have no idea are accurate these figures are but I can compare them over the coming months. To be honest I would have hoped for better, on the plus side my running has come on in leaps and bounds and some fat has turned to muscle. I last measured myself at the start of September and again today figures are September first January second Chest 47in 44.5in Waist 40in 41in Stomach 46in 43in Buttocks 45in 41in left Thigh 24.5in 22.5in Left Calf 16.5in 17.5in Right Thigh 25in 22in Right Calf 17in 17.5in. Again some up some down this shows far better than scales I really do recommend measuring over the scales I only wish I measured this time last year.

Whilst I have had ups and downs way more ups I am still learning and evolving and I need those close to me to understand that I need help with this for the rest of my life the least amount of temptation the greater the chance of success I understand how difficult this is because I used to be in the cycle of boom or bust with the bust always happening and making things worse, now I have no bust just minor hiccups along the way. This has been the best year of my life ever and in truth it has gone quickly even though at times it seemed slow, everyone on a slimpod will understand this we all want results and straight away but it's just not going to happen quickly the watch word is patience and lots of it.

I thank you all for reading my blog this year and I look forward to blogging in 2012 with my target weight getting closer and my running career going from strength to strength. To all the critic's that may see this I did not do this on my own I did not just eat less I did this with the help and support of http://www.ThinkingSlimmer.com.